Goodbyes are never easy, especially when you have to deal with deaths and that is what happened yesterday. My wife had to say goodbye to her grandmother, someone who was the rock of their family and who took care of everyone and never once thought of herself.

Today marks a new day in our lives a day with out Grandma. A day when hurt and pain, takes over and controls the loss, but that the memories are and will forever be there and strong. Grandma was an amazing woman, who put everyone else first and herself last. She would offer advice when asked and sometimes when you didn’t. She would give you a look to let you know that you needed to knock it off or a smile to let you know that it was ok.

Goodbyes are hard, plan and simple and tonight, after the kids get home from school, we will sit them down and explain that Grandma has died and is no longer here. Trying to explain death to a 4 year old, is not something that I had really wanted to do, but death is part of life. And I think that part of my issue with explaining it to the boys, is that I to some degree do not understand death myself. I mean, logically, yes, I understand death, but big picture, it is an unknown and unknowns scare me.

I remember after my Grandfather passed away, my father pulled me aside and tried to explain death to me and from what little I remember, it did not make any sense what so ever, but I do remember one thing and that was this, “let’s say our goodbyes, as we’ll see him again one day.” And that statement provided a great deal of hurt and frustration, but more importantly, comfort.

Grandma, you will be missed. You took on the role of my Grandma too, shortly after my Grandmother passed away from Alzheimer’s and I remember you putting your arms around me and telling me that I would see her again. I will always remember how you would have a Coconut cake waiting on me when you knew that I would be there, as that was what my Grandmother always made me. You were the rock of the family and the one that we all looked to for guidance and approval. You will be missed, but you are no longer in any pain. But this isn’t me saying my goodbyes, this is me saying that I’ll see you one day again.