Marriage is hard, but the first year of marriage with kids, is pretty rough too. Focusing on each other is important and shouldn’t be overlooked. Yes, the first priority should be the kids, but then, you still have to spend time for each other.

Here are some things that we do:

• Date night is important and we have tried to focus on going out once a month. To help save money, find another couple and offer to baby sit for free so that they too can enjoy a date night and then they can watch your kids when you need a night out on the town.
• Eat dinner together after the kids go to bed and talk about our day. I think that this will change once the boys are able to talk, as I hope that we will all eat together at the dinner table together.
• We talk, and we try to avoid the basic small talk, but we talk about the kids, work, if we are on track with our goals for the year. And actually listen, not think about 10 things that have to be done tomorrow.

Remember, before there were kids, it was just you two and you have to spend time on each other as well.