Life

With two boys, there is always a competition, even at the age of 2.  Who can talk the loudest. Who can say the first word. Who can run. Who can throw a ball the furthest. And the list goes on and on. But, I realized something this week, Baby B has done the majority of the major milestones first: rolling over, crawling, walking, talking and now, learning his alphabet. But, Baby B still isn’t talking as much as he needs to. Whereas Baby A, did everything second, but doesn’t stop talking. Ever.

Baby A can now piece together between 2 and 4 word sentences. He can ask for things. He can do simple tasks that we ask, giving things to his brother, picking up toys, etc. Baby B, well, he is getting there. But, Baby B walked up to me the other day and pointed to my St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital Hey St. Jude t-shirt and said “U”. So, I figured, why not just ask to point to other letters. I asked letter by letter, mixing up the order and each time, Baby B correctly pointed to each letter. The next night, I while wearing my University of Texas football t-shirt, I asked Baby B to point to the different letters, and each time, he got them right.

Each night, we ask the boys certain letters of the alphabet at dinner and often times they get them right. But, this was the first time that I had tried to ask specific letters of the alphabet and have him point to letters. So, even though he isn’t talking as much as he should, he is definitely pointing to the letters that are asked of him.

 

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It is very easy to bring a bad day home from work and allow frustrations to carry over. But what do you do when you get mad?

Today I was getting frustrated with work, I had to pass up a great concert and 2nd row seats.  My wife was on call, so that meant that I was going to have to go home and prepare dinner and all I could think about, was how frustrated that I was with work. I wanted to be mad. I wanted to have some downtime to clear my head. And then I came across this video clip about Mister Rodgers getting mad.

And Mister Rogers is right. Everyone makes a mistake and it is ok to be mad, but it isn’t ok to take it out on your kids. They didn’t do anything. And even if they did, it still doesn’t warrant taking your frustrations out on them.

We need more life lessons like this from Mister Rogers and less from the reality tv shows.

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Perspective can be a noun, verb or adjective. And in my humble opinion can be best summarized as how we view things, situations, the world, etc.

There has been a lot going on lately, work, kids, Baby B and speech therapy, finances, life, family, etc. But today, I took a different look and changed my perspective on how I am viewing things. A close friend had a stroke today. There will be a long road ahead, but they are alive. Baby B has a session with the speech pathologist this week, but he is making sounds and trying to speak. Money is tight due to some unforeseen things that popped up, but we can eat and have food on the table tonight.

Perspective can make or break you, because depending on how you look at and view a situation, can determine how you react/handle a situation. So tonight, I will go home and hug my boys. I’ll play with them a little longer tonight. And before I goto bed, I’ll say another prayer for my friend, that even though she has a long road ahead, she is alive. She will be here to give me a hard time.

So how will you look at life?

What will your perspective be?

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We finally got the call from the speech pathologist and she confirmed what we suspected, that Baby B, needed speech therapy. Actually, she said that he qualified for expressive and receptive speech therapy.

I am a web developer, I don’t have the first clue what expressive and receptive speech therapy means? I did a lot of Google searches and this site, for me, helped put it more into perspective, click here.  And this summary, basically says it all:

Receptive language disorder means a child has difficulties understanding what is said to them. Other names for receptive language disorder include central auditory processing disorder and comprehension deficit. In most cases the child also has an expressive language disorder, which means they have trouble using spoken language.

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I still don’t know how Baby B scored on his test, not that it really matters. Though, I would like to see where he is on the scale, meaning how severe of a delay is he? But, he is going to start speech therapy soon and that will be the start of getting him back on track. He has already started saying more words, and as we encourage him more to speak, he seems to be saying more words everyday.

Now, we just wait. We ask more questions. We encourage him to speak more. And we the help of speech therapy, Baby B should be going strong and talking in a matter of no time.
Or, that is what I’m telling myself at least.

 

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Today marks Day 1 of a new challenge that I have setup for myself and one that I hope that will continue for a very long time.

Ever since I turned 21, I have been reminded that both sides of my family struggles with alcohol. I have known it and have always been really mindful of it. The last 2 – 3 weeks have been really stressful at work and instead of coming home and having a beer or a glass of wine, I was doing 3 – 4.
I was drinking to get through the stress. I knew it. I didn’t want to admit it, but I recognized it. And when I said out loud that I was doing this, I felt like the world was being lifted off of my shoulders.

This past Sunday night, my wife and I had a long conversation and it was really me more or less mapping out what I wanted to do, to try to ensure that I am here for a long time for the boys.
And for the first time in my life, I acknowledged, that if I didn’t make changes, that I wouldn’t be here to watch the boys grow up. So, I asked my wife to give me 2 – 3 nights a week that I could work out
at the gym. I’ve already been doing a pretty decent job with the meals, so I wasn’t as concerned about that.

Today marks Day 1 of this new journey. Day 1 of a new me and a new life. I am fortunate that a few friends are taking this same approach to getting in better shape. I think that the biggest feeling for me, is that there will be accountability, because
several good friends will also be doing this and we will be able to keep each other on track.

 

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Do you worry? Worry about life? Your kids? Finances?

Well of course you do, you are human and we all worry about something.

While driving to work today, a buddy of mine sent this to me as a text message and I thought that it was only  appropriate to share.

34Don’t worry about tomorrow. It will take care of itself. You have enough to worry about today.
Matthew 6:34
https://www.youversion.com/bible/392/mat.6.34.cevus06

I’m not saying that after I read that passage, that I didn’t worry. But, I was reassured. So take a moment, look outside and enjoy those that are around you.

And try to not worry so much.

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Tonight, I sit speechless. I put the boys to bed, as usual. But it wasn’t usual tonight. I talked with them about life, about God, and anything and they sat and listened. We talked, we laughed and we prayed for my best friend that lives just outside of Oklahoma City.

As a Christian, it is times like this that I wonder. I wonder what God was thikning when thi s happened. I believe that there is/was a plan, however we will never see it. So as I read that 51+ are dead and 24 maybe kids, I just wonder, “what was God thinking”.

It isn’t my place to question God like that though. I only hope and pray that he uses people as a way to show how to overcome adverser.

#OklahomaStrong

 

 

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Sometimes in life, you just have to Let It Go.

Life can get you down really quickly. Pressures from work can get you down really quickly. Relationships can get you down really quickly.
So what do I do? I Let It Go. And this little band called Cowboy Mouth has the perfect song for that.

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I shared a story this morning with a close family friend that he encouraged me to blog about. And it is about how sometimes, you have to listen to the voice in your head.

This past Saturday night, my wife, the boys and I walked into Buffalo Wild Wings for dinner. And as we did, we passed a table with a couple that was having dinner before their prom. They were happy and smiling and laughing. And it was just contagious the way that they were enjoying their dinner and life in general. And as I walked by, this little voice in my head said, “buy their dinner”. No, I’m not crazy and I’m not trying to start a religious conversation, but I do think that God can give us nudges sometimes.

Our waiter leads us to the back of the restaurant, but I can still clearly see the kids laughing and smiling. And the entire time, I keep hearing in my head, “buy their dinner” and I tried to shake it but the more I dismissed the idea, the more I had this tugging that I needed to do this. So, I get up, grab my waiter and tell him that I want to buy the kids dinner and asked if he could get their waiter over so I could get their bill. The waiter just looked at me and smiled and said that it was really cool of me to want do that and to let him see what he could do. It was at this point, that my wife smiled and looked at me and then realized that I had done. A few minutes, their waiter goes to their table and tells them that someone wanted to buy their dinner, but wouldn’t tell them who, as I asked that we remain anonymous.

After our food was brought to our table, I looked up and saw the cute couple walking to another table to visit some of their friends and what I later found out was also family.  The high school boy kept adjusting his tie and his tux, making sure that it was perfect. But the smile that he had on his face was just awesome and one that I’ll never forget.  You see, the young couple both had Down’s Syndrome. And the waiter that was taking care of the couple, told me that this was their first prom and in fact, it was their first date ever.

I did not buy their dinner because they had Down’s Syndrome. I bought their dinner, because sometimes in life, we get these little nudges through the voice in our heads and I think that if we act on that voice, that something big could happen. And it did. I saw how happy they were. I saw how much they were enjoying the moment of life. And as we left the restaurant, we walked past the couple and their families and one of the mom’s told a friend that someone in the restaurant paid for the kids to have dinner and how neat that it was.  And my wife and I just smiled as we got in and watched them getting ready to head to their prom, because for a few moments in life, a small gesture on our part, gave us a lifetime of memories.

It is the small things in life that matter the most.  And if you get the chance, do something nice and out of the ordinary for someone else, but do it in a way that no one else knows that you did it.

Listen to that little voice in your head, that nudge that tells you to do something, because I would hate for you to miss out on a life changing moment.

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The hardest part about being an adult, has to be making decisions.  But, there is a difference in making decisions that only effect you personally and making a decision that effects your entire family. And that is where I am today.

What do I do? What is the best career move for my family? Do we move closer to my family down south? Do we move to Houston, where I also have family and friends, but it is Houston and that is all that matters.

The older that we get, the harder a lot of decisions become to make. We are lucky, because the boys are still young and have no friends to speak of. But, we do have family here. But, if we move to Houston, we could provide more for the boys. But, it would be harder for my wife’s family to see the boys. But, my family would see the boys and so would my friends in Houston. But that would require us selling our house and moving. But, that would mean a much bigger house and lower cost of living.

Decisions. Remember when the hardest decision was what tv show to watch? Or what bar to go to that night? Or what you were going to have for dinner?

Man, kids can really make decisions harder, but also easier too.

Decisions. Decisions. Decisions.

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