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This morning, the sports world woke to the news that the Baltimore Ravens WR Torrey Smith was dealt with the news that his younger brother had died from a horrible motorcycle accident.  Fans in Baltimore were asking if he was going to play tonight and at the end of the day, it is just a game. But some how, Torrey Smith was able to play tonight. And not only did he play tonight, he was the difference tonight.

Torrey posted the following tweet this morning:

“I can’t believe my little brother is gone,” Smith wrote on his Twitter account Sunday morning. “Be thankful for your loved ones and tell them you love them. .. This is the hardest thing ever.”

Tonight, before the game, I told my wife that Torrey Smith would be the difference tonight. He was the difference, because tonight, it is just a game.  As he goes through the next few days, his focus on his family, as it should, because when the Ravens step on the field Thursday night, it is just a game.  My heart and prayers go out to Torrey Smith and his family tonight and in the days to come.  His family will deal with this for a lifetime, missing their family member.  But for a few hours tonight, Torrey was able to put life on hold, because tonight, it is just a game, but now, he deals with the loss of his little brother.

I came across this video of Torrey Smith tonight for The Living Legacy Foundation:

Torrey, tonight, I say this little prayer for you and your family and it comes from Numbers 6:24-26

The Lord bless you

and keep you;

the Lord make his face shine upon you

and be gracious to you;

the Lord turn his face toward you

and give you peace.”’

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I’m going to get nailed for this post, but oh well, here goes. Trophies. I hate them and here is why I have a problem with giving them out to children playing sports.

Kids today are growing up and thinking that if you try your best, then everyone gets trophies. Wrong. I understand kids playing t-ball, teach the fundamentals and do not keep score, but there comes a point in time that kids need to learn that there are winners and there are losers and at the end of the game, that trophies are not handed out for doing your best. Kids need to understand that sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, sometimes, it rains the game out. Point being, we can not always win every game. And we sure as heck do not get trophies as we grow up and go through life for trying hard.

My nephew called the other day to tell me that he got a hit in his t-ball game. And that was awesome. I was so proud of him and I wish that I could have been there to see him run the bases, because when he called me, I could tell how happy he was. And he told me how they all lined up at the end of the game and congratulated the other team. So when I asked who won, there was a long pause. So I asked which team scored the most runs? Again, a long pause. So, I asked if everyone got trophies and they did and he was so happy.

I get it, trophies symbolize something to little kids, a since of accomplishment. But it also sets the bar low too, because in life, we have to work harder than the other person to rise throughout the company and move ahead.  We need to teach kids that it is OK to work hard, that it is OK to put in the extra time at practice to get ahead. By just saying that everyone is getting trophies, it just says that everyone is at the same level and the are not. I have two sons, I am guessing that one is going to be better at baseball than the other.  I do not know for sure, but that is just my guess. But I am going to tell them how when I was a kid, I hit 200 balls a day, year round. And I would shoot 100 free throws a day, year round. Or I would run to stay in shape, year round. I did not want to be average, I wanted to start at either short stop or third base for my baseball team and I did. I wanted to be either the Point Guard or the Shoot Guard and I wanted to be the one that the coach would point to at the end of the game when the score was tied, to take the winning shot and I was. Hard work pushed me to the next level, not getting a trophy and it has continued throughout my work career as well.

So, today, after lunch and I do my job, I think that I am going to ask if we can all get trophies, because we all showed up today. Good job us!

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I’m sure that you are thinking that this is about raising kids or having kids or something along those lines, well, you are wrong. With all of the weather related events over the last few months, it got me thinking, if my family was ready for a disaster or not?  So I ask again, are you ready? Because I am not, but I will be.

Here are a few helpful resources:

Take time and prepare today, because you do not know what tomorrow is going to hold and if you are going to need those supplies. Will you be ready?

 

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Tonight, as you play with your children, put them to bed for the night, hold them a little closer. I found out tonight that a friend from high school’s 13 year old son was tragically killed in an accident yesterday. There are no words that can be said to make up for their loss. There are no words or actions that will bring their son back. And there is no explanation.

We are not promised tomorrow or even the next 10 minutes here on Earth, so treasure each and every minute. As I am sure that my friend would give anything for 5 more minutes with his son. So tonight, as I watched my sons climb up the stairs for bed, I held them a little closer tonight and kissed them a few more times before turning out the lights and saying goodnight.

What would you do differently tonight, if tonight was your last night on Earth or your children’s last night? Would you play longer with them? Would you hold them closer and tell them how much you love them a few more times?

Tonight, my heart breaks for a family, that would give anything for one more night with their son.

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I had to go to the Dentist this morning, which is not my favorite thing to do. In fact, I would rather dodge traffic on a busy day, than go to the Dentist. But today, I went to a new Dentist and after about 5 minutes of talking and poking around in my mouth he informs me that I have a small cavity. Seriously? I am 36 and never had a cavity before in my life. Who was he to tell me this? I mean, I guess that since he is the Dentist, he probably knows what he is talking about.  But 15 minutes later, as we are wrapping up, I asked about when I should bring the boys in. He suggested that when they turn 2 or a little older, have them come in and watch, so that they can see that it isn’t a scary place (granted, this coming from the guy that told me that I had to have a filling because of said cavity). We have started brushing the boys teeth already, which is loads of fun. I can only imagine the trip to the Dentist being about as bad.

As I drove to work this morning, I thought that the only thing that would make my day a little better after leaving the Dentist, was stopping to pick up a bag of Candy Corn Pumpkins.

 

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Happy Anniversary to my wife of 4 years. We have been through a lot, probably more than most in a lifetime together, but we have come out stronger and better people.

But today, is a day that we will never forget. It is a day that brings happiness and sorrow, but today, is a day that marks 4 years of life together as a married couple. I love you.

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This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.
– View more here.

That is how we opened each worship service at church out in Texas and it still stays with me each and everyday. This is the day, is one of the first things that pops into my head each morning, because it is a reminder. It reminds me that today, is today that God made, and that no matter what happens, that I should enjoy it and be grateful.

So today, be grateful. Be Humble. Remember your faith. And remember that we are not promised tomorrow. So tomorrow, remember, that This is the day that the Lord has made, so rejoice and be glad in it.

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American FlagI was walking out of a Finance class at UNCW on September 11th and had just walked into the English Department to start my student job when I was told that a plane hit one of the Trade Towers.  Everyone in the department was huddled around a computer listening to details and everyone thought that it was just an accident. But I remembered from growing up, a family friend that was a commercial pilot had always said that that area was restricted and that they were to ditch in the river.  And then minutes later, word came in that the 2nd plane hit and it was then I realized that our lives as US citizens had forever changed. The world stood still. Lives were forever changed.

I hope that my children never have to go through a day like that. And it was not just one day. It was months. But something happened on September 11th, our nation came together. Neighbors helped neighbors. Friends were there to help lend a hand putting out flags in their yard. We were a country, not divided by political beliefs or financial status, but we were one.  One country. One nation. I still remember like it was yesterday how no matter where you drove in the days following, there were American flags being proudly displayed. I still remember not being able to get enough of the news and learning new details. I still remember the uncertainty of more attacks and would we be going to war? I still remember the candle light vigils. I still remember the moments of prayer and moments of silence. I still remember seeing President Bush standing on the rubble in the days after the cleanup began.  I still remember the photographs of families, crying and the images of children who had lost their parent(s) that day.

So today, no matter where you are, take a moment of quiet time. Stop and reflect on that day, the lives that were lost and those that were left behind and that have suffered, either from losing a family member or those that helped in the rescue and cleanup.

I still remember September 11th as the day that stood still.

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Each day, we learn something new. A new route to take to work. A computer shortcut that makes our job more productive. A new parenting technique, that will probably not work tomorrow.

But, here are some of the things that I’ve learned thus far of being a dad.
1) I am not my father.
2) I am not perfect, but my boys still love me just the same.
3) That during the day, I often wonder what they are doing when I am at work.
4) That they have really learned a lot thus far, walking, talking, eating, wanting to be more independent, etc.
5) That I do not know if I will ever be satisfied in what I am able to provide financially for the boys and my family in general?
6) And probably the most important thing that I can do, is love my boys unconditionally.

I realize that this is only a small list of things that I’ve learned over the last year, but I have a lifetime to learn and more importantly, learn from my mistakes.

 

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My wife had attended the same church for almost 30 years, minus the years that she was away at college. And when we started dating, we went to the same church that she grew up in. But for the last 2 years, I had been struggling. I needed more. I wanted more. You see, when I lived in Texas, I went to an amazing church. I went to a church that I was a big part of and wanted to do even more. I was there all the time. But the church that my wife and I had been attending, I just could not get that attached to. And I don’t know why?

But something happened 2 weeks ago. My wife looked at me and said, I think that I am ready for us to look at a going to a new church. Man, I was floored, excited, relieved, and a little nervous. I wasn’t sure if my wife was just saying this or if she really wanted more? Would there be a falling out if we went to a new church?

Well, we went to a new church yesterday. Still a United Methodist church, which we both wanted. But a new church none the less. We walked in, we were greeted immediately. We walked the boys down to the nursery and they walk in and start playing. The service was good. We figured that since we were trying something new, why not try the contemporary service, which was really more of a blend of the traditional and contemporary services, the biggest difference being that they had a praise and worship band.  After church, the day kind of got away from us and after we put the boys down and my wife and I were eating dinner, she asked what I thought about the service that we went to? And we just talked.

We talked about not only the church and how we felt, but why it took my wife so long to get to the point of being ready to look at going to a new church. We lead into more of a conversation about how important the church is to both of us and yet, how we had allowed other things to prevent us from going over the last year. I think that our lives are getting ready to really shift and take on a new meaning and dynamics. And it started with the new church.

 

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