August 2014

Tonight while at dinner, a friend sent me a message that Robin Williams had died. I sat in shock, though I had never met Robin, I have admired his work for years.

After getting home, getting the boys settled, I began ready news stories and the outpouring of responses from friends, family and fans throughout the US. And two big things that stood out to me: 1) it appears that he struggled with mental illness for a long time and 2) his charitable donations of his time to raise money will be sorely missed.

Mental illness is becoming a topic of conversation that our country can no longer avoid. We are losing more and more people each and everyday due to suicide and mental illness. It is time that we as a society do something to address the issues, instead of cutting state funding for treatment. Mental all illness is a serious problem that isn’t going away. We can either face the problem and work on solutions or face more deaths.

As for his giving of his time, Robin Williams was a HUGE supporter of the USO and went on many comedy tours overseas to support our troops. He also did a lot with Make A Wish and St Jude Hospital, to name just a few. This will be a huge loss for these organizations and for those effected.  But they aren’t the only ones that are losing out, so are his family, his friends, co-workers, and fans.

Here are three clips from three of my favorite movies that Robin Williams was in:

Goodwill Hunting:

Dead Poets Society:

Patch Adams:

I grew up watching Robin Williams and I think that as so many, I feel a since of loss. A loss that is small in comparison to others, but his death will leave a void. He was one of the funniest comedians of my time. He appeared in roles that varied from a loud solider in Good Morning Vietnam, to a loving compassionate therapist in Good Will Hunting to a soon to be Doctor in Patch Adams. And it is through those characters that we all connected with, but it is through those characters we will all miss.

So tonight, Robin Williams, may you sleep easy. May you no longer be in pain. But more importantly, may your family feel the comfort and the love of those that loved you.

Rest in Peace Robin.

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There are times in life, where things do not make a lot of since. There are times where we feel that we are at the top of our game and other times where we are as low as we can go. Today, I just felt blessed.  Blessed to have two amazing boys that just amaze me each and every day.

I took the boys to Target, Home Depot and to the park and I couldn’t have asked for them to have acted any better. They both told me when they had to goto the bathroom. They both let me shop and helped hold and put things into the basket.

It is days like today, that I just sit back and realize how blessed that I really am.

 

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Last night, there was no excuse for my behavior.  Ok, so maybe that is an extreme, but I had a really long day at work.  I was not myself and was really in a bad mood.

As I was driving home, I listened to relaxing music, I tried talking with my Dad and well, that really didn’t help. I got home, the nanny didn’t really help. I changed, the nanny left, and it was just me and the boys. We played while I cooked dinner. I got plates set for dinner and some jazz loaded on my phone.  The boys didn’t touch their grilled chicken and tater tots, they just wanted to play.

It was then I realized that their schedules were off. The nanny let them take a 2 1/2 hour nap earlier today, gave them ice cream at 5pm and their day was just off. And so was mine, but that is no excuse. It is no excuse for me to take my frustrations of my day out on my boys. I realize that I am just a human, but my sons did not do anything wrong tonight. And please understand, I wasn’t mean to my sons, but I didn’t have a lot of patience. So after dinner, we went upstairs and relaxed before we got ready for bed.

Baby B, as usual, he was asleep within minutes. Baby A, could not get settled. He was up and down. He had to pee. He had to look for a toy, which was under his pillow, he had to get a stuffed animal, then he had to look out the window, you get the idea. I was frustrated. I didn’t have the patience for the up and down. I was not in the mindset for him not being able to be settled. I just wanted him to goto sleep so that I could eat and wrap up some work from today.

But at the end of the day, there is no excuse in my getting frustrated with him. Is it his fault that he took a nap today? No. Is it his fault that he had to pee? No. Heck, we want him to be potty ed trained and he did what we have asked him to do.

Son, I promise to always put you first. I promise to put you above work. I promise to have more patience, especially on days that I have very little patience. There are no excuses. I love you.

 

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I often thought that was something that was taught, not instinctively learned, but I might be changing my views on this one.

Last night as I put the boys down, we read, watched a Dino Dan tv show, and the boys got in their beds, Baby A, who was incredibly tired, laid his head on his pillow and curled up. Baby B, who said goodnight to his brother, got up and put a blanket on his brother and covered him up. Compassion at its best.

I have never told Baby B to do cover up his brother or anyone else, but he instinctively he got up and made sure that his brother was ok and covered up. It is these moments in life and experiences that I see, that I realize more and more what compassion is all about, especially as it relates to the boys and to our family.

My wife’s job is full of compassion, as she supports families after they have lost a loved one. I don’t know how she does it, but she is able to provide a since of comfort and peace at a moment when a family needs it the most. We together, try to show through our actions, compassion, in hopes that our boys will pick up on the desire to help others in need.

I’ve come to realize that as a parent, I get to see and be a major influence in my children’s lives. It is my job to teach and mold them for their future. But it is those moments when I realize how much they are teaching me.

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This morning I actually got to sleep in for a little bit.  But I was awoken to the sound of an iPad hitting the floor and my 3 year old screaming.

I had two options, get mad that he had the iPad upstairs when he had been told numerous times to keep it downstairs or comfort him in knowing that accidents happen from time to time.  After making sure that he was ok and safe, as their was glass all over the floor. I started thinking about the costs, realizing that the iPad was no longer covered under the support plan. Thinking about upcoming bills. No extra income to replace it. I had two choices, but upset and stressed out or realize that accidents happen.

Accidents happen all the time, but it is how we respond that makes the difference and today as I held my son and talked with him about accidents and why we don’t take the iPad upstairs, I was reminded to when I was a kid and broke something of my mothers and she didn’t get mad. She didn’t raise her voice. She just said that accidents happen and kept on going.

I hope that my boys saw how I handled today and when they get older, they will realize that accidents happen.

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